How to know if you’re a loser
From the files of Personal Development:
I recently hopped on FacelessBook and came across a post that actually made me think.
“This morning at Starbucks I listened to someone literally complain to a “friend” about everything not going well in their life.
Which was pretty much everything lol.
Not enough money.
Apartment / landlord doesn’t do a good job.
Trying to make things work but nothing’s working.
And this “friend,” just sat there and listened and said encouraging stuff like:
“you’ll get through it”
“happens to the best of us”
“oh that’s horrible I’m sorry”
…And a whole bunch of other meaningless, selfish mumbo jumbo that will NEVER help this person.
SERIOUS REALITY CHECK:
Wanna know how many people actually, truly care about you?
Count the people who’ve told you something you didn’t want to hear, who’ve made you angry, perhaps came across a bit “rude” (gasp) — but have made you THINK and as a result, created positive change.
If nobody makes the list, ditch your current environment and go get a new one.
We are NOT all “winners.”
Some people are losers… comfortable with blaming their issues on the world, other people, the government, etc. If you hang with those people you become those people.
AND (bonus): if you read this and get offended, it means you are probably a loser and need to start hanging out with some winners.”
The responses were predictable.
On one side, people were screaming ‘that’s right buddy, nailed it!”
And one the other side, “have empathy, just listening is being a friend”.
Here are my thoughts:
— While it’s true the easiest route is just to show empathy and listen, it’s not going to help this person change.
— The first step to mastering anything is becoming consciously incompetent (become aware of your inadequacy).
— People of excellence demand the same from their peers.
— You become the people you spend the most time with.
— Coaches/True friends tell the truth, even when it hurts.
— The skill of influence is the ability, to be honest with empathy and compassion.
Here’s how this ties into your speaking career… The fact is most people won’t have the courage to get out there and speak.
And they will give you a million reasons under the sun as to why you shouldn’t.
… It doesn’t work
… it costs too much
… it takes too much time
… I can’t get speaking gigs
… blah blah blah…
Choose to hang with ‘winners’ of the speaking game, that will tell you how it really is. (Warts and all)
We hang out here:
Onward and upward,
Jeff “Sterling” Paro
The Chiro Speaking Co.
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